1. |
Stoplights
02:39
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Stoplights
It’s crazy living in the world today
there’s so much going on
a lot of problems that we need to face
if we’re gonna get along
It’s time to make things better
it’s time to make a positive change
life could be so much easier if we start
using our brains
I was waiting on a stoplight down on sixth
reading in my phone about the behavior of squids
their mating habits seem regressive to me
then I heard a honk because the light was green
Stoplights should ding when they turn green
they should let you know that they’re changing
you should know that it’s green
when you hear a ding ding ding
The honk made an angry sound
embarrassed me in front of everyone around
and as the shame rippled down that busy street
the fabric of society pulled apart at the seams
So why not give us a ding
It’s time to make things better
a nicer world could be close at hand
it’s time to let people know that the light is green
without honking at a good natured man
Stoplights should ding when they turn green
they should let you know that they’re changing
you should know that it’s green
when you hear a ding ding ding
Gimme a ding
when it’s green
Gimme a ding ding ding
when it’s green
Gimme a ding
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2. |
Cincinnati Girls
02:54
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Cincinnati Girls
Cincinnati girls like getting their haircut
Cincinnati girls like getting their nails done
Cincinnati girls like wearing their boot cut jeans
get lost in the mall daydreamin their dreams
Cincinnati girls bah bah bah bah bah
Cincinnati girls love watching movies
Cincinnati girls find white noise soothing
Cincinnati girls have a way of moving where they glide
across the floor without movin their legs
Cincinnati girls love the summer they love the fall
Cincinnati girls can grow to be ten feet tall
Cincinnati girls bootcut jeans hair in a bob
they daydream all the time and get lost in the mall
Cincinnati girls are slightly see through
Cincinnati girls wear jeans that flare over their boots
Cincinnati girls speak up they can’t hear you they are lost in
thoughts and daydreams as they float round the mall
Cincinnati girls like shopping for new stuff
Cincinnati girls it’s unclear what they’re made of
Cincinnati girls bob hair boot cut ten foot tall deaf
slightly transparent ghosts lost at the mall
Cincinnati girls bah bah bah bah bah
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3. |
Feliz Cumpleaños
03:37
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Feliz Cumpleaños
You don’t have to know every word
when you travel around the world
English works pretty good
if you want to be understood
You don’t have to know everything
humans are simple beings
but when you’re helped in a foreign land
and you want to express your thanks
Just remember…
Feliz cumpleaños means thank you in Spanish
feliz cumpleaños means thank you in Spanish
travel around the world it ain’t too much to manage
to know how to say thank you to someone who’s Spanish
Feliz means I am thankful
cumpleaños means to you
two words that everyone
should know how to use
You don’t have to know every word
when you travel around the world
but it’s good to not be rude
and to show your gratitude
Just remember…
It’s the two words everyone should know
Feliz cumpleaños and it means thank you
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4. |
Reggae Music
03:55
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Reggae Music
Reggae music’s
the best type of music
it’s the only music I listen to
you can tell if I’m hangin’ with the boys
and we’re jammin’
we put on a reggae tune or two
if I could play or if could sing
you know it’s reggae music
I’d be performin
But fortunately for me
I got all these CDs
when I got a hankerin’ to groove
and I’d like to say thank you
for the reggae
to all the biggest names
I’d like to say thank you for the reggae
to them
Once upon a time
not too long ago
I was headed down the wrong way down a wrong way road
I was listening to
whatever crap they played
on the stupid old regular radio
Then I met a guy
named Sean Appleby
He had a spare CD player and
he burned me some CDs
And now I just play reggae
24 hours a dang day
It’s a party everywhere I go
And I’d like to say thank you for the reggae
to Sean Appleby
I’d like to say thank you for the reggae CDs
to him
Let’s hear it for the Reggae
Let’s hear it for the reggae
Let’s hear it for the Reggae Music that I’ve heard
Let’s hear it for the Reggae
Let’s hear it for the reggae
Let’s hear it for the Reggae songs on the CDs that Sean burned for me
If that’s what they are
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5. |
Looking Good Is Stupid
03:07
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Looking Good Is Stupid
I look like crap
as you can see
I look like the aspect is off on the TV
I look like you swept out from under an easy chair
and made a guy outta what was under there
I look like you put a T-shirt on a tumbleweed
I look like one of those trees from Lord of the Rings
I look like Jeremiah Johnson got attacked by bees
I look like a Goodwill rack caught a disease
and that’s good
to me
i think that’s the best kinda way you can be because
Looking good is stupid
looking good is stupid
looking good is stupid
there’s no reason to do it
looking good is stupid
I look like Zach Galifianakis gave up
I have the same head to body ratio as Elmer Fudd
I look like an anthropomorphic hay bale
I look like Ed Sheeran just drank from the wrong grail
I look like a donkey burrowing into a pair of jeans
I look like all the Bee Gees got into the fly machine
I look like the guy in the bear from Midsommar escaped
I look like a one man performance of Planet of the Apes
If a UFO came down
to our planet
with the intention
of doing harm to those who inhabit it
I’d rather not have cool shoes
and shimmering hair
everybody noticing when I walk in somewhere
I’d rather look inconspicuous like me
like maybe i just grew out of a rock or a tree
I’d rather look extremely bad all the time
and if you’re wondering why that is that’s why
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6. |
Forget Me Nachos
04:17
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Forget Me Nachos
It was half past beer thirty on a Friday
when she walked in the bar
she ordered a cold brew form the menu
and it came in a chilled mason jar
i offered her a teriyaki wing
and must’ve said something that made her smile
got us a round of silver bullets
and before we knew it we were sharing a slice of key lime pie
by midnight we were walking on the beach
double fistin’ two modelos each
but by the time we’d crushed our brunch bloodies
we were sailin’ on to disparate seas
So now I’m eatin the Forget Me Nachos
at the Summer Heartbreak Saloon
on the corner of lost love road
and whoops i blew it avenue
we had a few happy hours
but like the house ribeye we’re overdone
I guess these mango margaritas
really are 2 for one
She was slender as a tooter shot
and loaded like a tater skin
her eyes were blue as Curacao
and big as dipping ramekins
but the fling we had went bad & split in half
like an old clam shell
and now this one set of footprints in the sand
is cuz i’m all by myself
under the stars on the beach we slept
with take home containers under our heads
but the sunrise in the morning was a warning red
and our leftovers went to the gulls instead…
So now I’m eatin the Forget Me Nachos
at the Summer Heartbreak Saloon
on the corner of lost love road
and whoops i blew it avenue
We had a real nice entree
but when the check came she wanted to split
grabbed herself a pina colada and escaped
while I calculated the tip
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7. |
Runnin Boo
03:42
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Runnin Boo
I’ll never forget
back when we first met
the energy we seemed to have
God we were like teens
all libido and dreams
but now we’re old and our bodies are bad
But I’m still in love with you
and you’re still my only boo
and of that you know I am sure
and when I come home at night
and I look into your eyes
I want to promise you the world and more
Girl you know that I would die for you
I’ll do anything you want me to
move a mountain paint a grey sky blue
redirect a river straight to you
I could carry you across the earth
take you up to heaven like a bird
just don’t ask me to run to you
you do not wanna see me runnin’ boo
you do not wanna see me runnin’ boo
There’s no limit to the love
that I am capable of
since you became my main boo
Unless there’s a distance
more than a couple steps
that you need me to run across or through
and it’s not that i can’t run
if i like really need to run
it’s just no one should have to look at that
it’s like watching the end
of Miike’s Audition
or those long ASPCA ads
Girl you know that I would die for you
I’ll do anything you want me to
pull the moon out of the sky for you
take you round the world in a canoe
if it’s metaphorical I’m good for it
I’m no athlete but i’m clearly a poet
so just don’t ask me to run to you
you do not wanna see me runnin boo
you do not wanna see me runnin boo
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8. |
Sunset Zorb
02:00
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Baby lemme take you on a sunset Zorb
just a rollin’ and a bouncin’ in a big old orb
suns going down, oops you’re in trouble
bout to be bouncin’ with me in a bubble called a Zorb
sunset Zorb
bout to be bouncing with me in a bubble called a Zorb
You don’t need a license like scuba diving
no high speeds like zipline riding
no parachute and no big fall
just a fun safe ride in a big old ball
strap on in and lets start to roll
freely breathin’ through the Zorb’s air holes
a Zorb is a big transparent ball
with straps to hold ya against the wall
Baby lemme take you on a sunset Zorb
just a rollin’ and a bouncin’ in a big old orb
suns going down, oops you’re in trouble
bout to be bouncin’ with me in a bubble called a Zorb
sunset Zorb
bout to be bouncing with me in a bubble called a Zorb
Don’t worry baby it’s totally safe
only 3 people ever have died this way
and they were high up mountainous terrain
with Zorb guides who were insufficiently trained
my Zorb guy have a five star ratin’
so come on in the Zorb funs a-waitin’
we’ll pick a flat spot nowhere near the road
so we won’t roll into traffic if we lose control
And as the sun goes down
we’ll be rolling around
laughing and a squealing as we
Zorb round the town
And as we tumble into bliss
you know my only wish
is that these straps were
loose enough that i could give you a kiss
In the Zorb
sunset Zorb
baby lemme take you on a sunset Zorb!!
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9. |
A Song For Mother Earth
04:24
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Mother Earth is our mother
and Mother Earth is our friend
she’s there to hold us tight
when we meet our end
you can lose your job and your house and then
what can you do
well that’s when Mother Earth provides
a cave or a hole for you
Waterways are her blood
and she likes those filled up with fishes and mud
not hot flouride water, detergent
and bleach
yet we wash our clothes pretty much
every week
Doing laundry is bad
for the ducks
doing laundry is bad
for the geese
doing laundry is bad
for Mother Earth and ergo
you and me
Big Laundry came in and cleaned us out
removed the stains of what was once a freethinking town
now we’re all stuck sucking at the corporate teat
slaves to our master: the laundry machine
Doing laundry is bad
for the fish
doing laundry is bad
for the clams
doing laundry is bad
for Mother Earth and ergo
you and me
So if you got a wife
or a mom or some friends
or anyone tries to tell you
it’s time to wash those underpants
you stand against
those trying to harm our precious Earth
and remind them that ocean fresh scent
is the smell of dead birds
and then Big Laundry came in and cleaned us out
removed the stains of what was once a freethinking town
now people think you gotta wash your sheets and your towels
even though you’re the only people in your house
Doing laundry is bad
for the whales
doing laundry is bad
for the squids
doing laundry is bad
for Mother Earth and ergo
you and me
People of the world come together and say
you do not have to wear clean underwear everyday
laundry is bad for mother earth
and ergo you and me
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