1. |
Cut My Grass
02:37
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Hey pal where you going
hey you got somewhere to be?
what’s that like is it neat?
I’ve always wondered why someone
would walk this direction down this street
in a crisp new pair of jeans
me I’m like a magazine
I got back issues
and I got
front and leg and face issues
doctor says it’s misuse
but I know the truth
our bodies weren’t designed for
the abuse of Earth’s gravity
one time I licked
a battery and saw
outside the walls of the confines
of this laboratory
they’re inside all the mirrors
and yet we carry on
like the words of that old song
by that band that was from Kansas
what were they called?
did you know that Rupaul is bald
do you know what you’d do if you got mauled
by a mountain lion are you sposed to try ’n
fight em or just go limp hey are blimps
still filled with flammable gas
or is it just hot air in the things
you’re not wearing any rings
are you skeptical of the deceptive pull
of monogamy or just trying to be
a complete person first before you
give in to to how society thinks
a so called family should
look
I could write a book
but nobody’s paying me
a Buffy the Vampire style fantasy
but nobody cares about good reads
it’s all reality tv
and have you seen what passes
for reality to these masses
it’s all boiled and concocted and
the dialogue is all chopped up
and rearranged to hit the exact
right spot in your brain
so you keep letting the ads
flow into your veins
not everyone can see it
but I see it
5 dollars for a cup of coffee
sure I’ll happily pay that much
what do you gotta wear some special
gold slippers when you’re pouring the stuff
they are cooking our brains
I went to a movie they had these
reclining seats
but you couldn’t do just your back and
not your feet
hey maybe I don’t wanna watch Dunkirk
with my feet up in stirrups doctor genius
can i get you anything from concessions
before you message my subconscious
with obnoxiously loud dolby surround
disguising what our programmers are saying
as we gobble up whatever muck
they’ve decided we deserve today
anyway I’ll let you go
maybe I’ll see ya down the road
and before you ask me let me say
yes I am angry
yes I am sad
and yes I am going to cut my grass
yes I am miserable
yes I am lost
and yes I know
that my grass is long
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2. |
The Devil Is A Rich Man
02:20
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wake up
button up a
crisp clean shirt
read the signs
form a line
get to work
step left once
double
clap
and turn
throw your hands up
if you’re ready to earn
pass a dollar left
that’s our economy
collect em in a bucket
and bring it to me
take a step back
and click your heals
extend right hand
and make a deal
schedule 2 claps
for the second verse
think about your budget
think a think about your budget
cuz life is expensive and the devil is a rich man
binary systematic
hops and dips
prop a whole
business model
up on tips
break time
close your eyes
long deep breaths
pin a market value
on relieving stress
pass 2 dollars right
that’s our economy
collect em in a bucket
and bring it to me
lift your right foot
and brush the toe
runnin out of time
for the claps you owe
can’t do em now
gotta mime a wall
think about your budget
think a think about your budget
cuz life is expensive and the devil is a rich man
gold member status
do a rumba dance
silver status
gimme a karate stance
bronze status bite yourself
on the wrist
you’re all in debt two claps
with interest
pass 3 dollars left
that’s the economy
now put em in a bucket
& that’s for me
clap once now
that’s a premium
now reorder the line
from weak to strong
empty out your wallet on to the floor
think about your budget
think a think about your budget
cuz life is expensive and the devil is a rich man
double time
kick line
stay on beat
now shimmy shimmy
duckwalk
and repeat
cup some change
in your hands
and shake shake
now high five
to your left
and do a plié
open up your phone
check the national debt
then write your mother’s maiden name
on a voided check
clap one time
that’s a premium
now reorder
the line
from smart to dumb
mark off some space that you think you deserve
think about your budget
think a think about your budget
cuz life is expensive and the devil is a rich man
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3. |
It's Gonna Stink
03:53
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when it’s time to pay the tab and all is said and done
and we’re poring over regrets of what’s led to what we’ve become
consider one aspect of our doomsday malaise
can you imagine the aroma of this world’s final days
how could we be so impossibly dense
to not ensure a more pleasant smelling apocalyptic event
it's gonna stink like hell when the world ends
it's gonna stink like hell when the world ends
have you been near the grill at the end of the day at a burger place?
have you slammed your garbage bin on a hot summer day?
you know that vacuum cleaner smell when it activates the carpet
or when a gas bubble belches in the asphalt at the la Brea tar pits
have you considered what an abandoned red lobster would smell like
or the produce section of someplace big like Walmart or Meijers
it’s gonna stink like hell when the world ends
it’s gonna stink like hell when the world ends
when the rapture comes and the lucky ones all disappear
and the rest of us are left to squabble in the dust and live in fear
imagine your resentment, as some innocent gets her wings
and you’re left smelling the rotten contents of her thawed out fridge
could not one of the great minds of ballistic or military advancement
have considered with their vastly oversized hippocampus
that when their high tech bombs are dropping all over the place
we might appreciate a hint of pine or fresh citrusy bouquet
it’s gonna stink like hell when the world ends
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4. |
I'm A Rock
03:06
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don’t even worry about the things you say
nobody’s listenin to you anyway
they only care if you’re in charge here
hey are you charge here
better say you are
don’t even worry bout the things you think
because we’re headed for the brink and
it’s gonna stink
you better
grab what you want
before I get there first cause
what’s a deep mind with a empty purse
there’s no difference between smart and dumb
there’s no difference between right and wrong
cause everybody’s got their own religion and mine is me
mine is me
hey everybody take a look at me I’m a rock
I’m the best thing you can be
I get whatever i want
I do whatever i want
I say whatever i want
I get whatever i want
I’m a rock
standing strong in the face of adversity
being wrong about whatever I wanna be
oblivion awaits us
so why not get a taste of
whatever i decide i need
oh I’m sorry is this confusing to you
were you raised to think i have some sort of duty to you
well I do
I’m here to show you what self interest can do
and codify what i think is normal
until you give in or puke
so chapter one of volume one of how to be a rock
how to dress and speak and style your hair and gesture and walk
how to make everyone treat you like they think you’re their boss
how to be freakin rock-solid bad ass rock
first remember you’re the narrator of your own truth
and a rock is firm and strong and does what it wants to do
just look at me, I’m a rock, that should prove it to you
so now do all the things I say because I tell you to
you’re gonna wanna look like you’re on television
so people think they have to listen to your stupid positions
and a rock derives its strength from the position it’s sittin
so it helps to be born heavy within a weighted system
you’re gonna wanna have a clan of opportunistic weasels
afraid of asking any questions and losing your approval
also it helps to have more money than everybody else
remember criticism of you is an attack on wealth
you’ll need a song to motivate you
how bout this one?
sure some people are gonna hate you
they must be miserable huh?
oblivion awaits us
so why not get a taste of
whatever you decide you need
You’re a rock
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5. |
Illegal
02:33
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Let’s make it
Illegal to be mean to me
there’s problems in the world today
but we can make em all go away
we gotta all be nice to me
we gotta punish everyone who’s mean
we need a tougher system in place
for eliminating all the hate
let’s round up everybody who’s mean and
make them go to jail for what they say to me
hey
I’m callin 911
you better give in or run
you better take back
what you said bout me
hey I’m callin the cops
cuz you been pissing me off
and now you’re going to jail
for being mean
hey
I’m callin 911
turn yourself in at once
they’ll lock you up and
throw away the key
hey I’m callin the cops
cuz you been breakin the law
with the things that you’ve said
about me
hey I’ve got you on tape
criticizing my face
when you coulda
shut up and let me be
now the tables have turned
and you should be concerned
cuz you’re going to jail
for being mean
you say I’m stupid
you go to jai
you say i’m ugly
you go to jail
you say I’m worthless
you go to jail
you say that I should go to jail you go to jail
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6. |
Glossy
03:25
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wasteland scene at the Seidenfadens
wet floor body limit smells like vomit we got
20 minutes till last call we got everybody waiting
for Rome to fall we got
2 drinks sticky shoes pit stains we got a thousand watts
thawing out our brains we got
maybe enough cash for the next few days
florescent lights dousin us in our own age
it’s a maze of politics and scuzzy dudes
gunpowder plotting how to light a fuse but then
deep in the corner makin her own fog there’s a
very glossy lady sweatin like it’s her job
glare bouncing off her face piercing and bright
now i’m walking like a dead man into the light
she looks good she looks damp like poseiden’s daughter
not a single speck of loreal powder on her
cheeks kinda red from the perspiration
she looks slick she looks active she looks vaccinated
skin shinin like gravy in a gravy boat
high gloss sheen like a piano you know
she’s like a hot dog
in a suede vest
excuse me madame you are under arrest
for lookin salt cured fried up boiled and wet
glossy like a magazine
hot off the press yes
aaahh
i gotta confess
I was not aware that I was into this
but your humidity’s drawin me into your web
my hair’s curlin up and and my palms are sweatin
i’m a mess but she looks magical and unstressed
like a newly polished mermaid figurehead
i gotta give it to her high sheen is her coat
she’s glistening like newly fallen untouched snow
It might be treacherous or lecherous to labor the point
but she’s a wishing well and i’m wishing I had more coins
did a master coat her skin with 5 coats of shellac
did he finish it with polish & carnuba wax
cuz she’s maxium sheen
like men at work
putting the gleam
on louis 16th’s furniture
the unrest outside washing off her back like a duck
eatin all the cake she wants and then burning it up
it’s too much I’ve heard of dripping but she’s got drip
bad vibes tryin to grip her but they get no grip
the angry mob tries to stop her but she’s too slick
plagues trying to get her her veneer’s too thick
biologically outfitted with a moisture shield
equipped to deal with any future hand she deals
I’ve heard that catfish have a slick layer that helps wounds heal
but that comparison i guess is sorta sub ideal
but for real it’s last call better get her a drink
replenish those electrolytes she’s misting us in
I gotta give it to her high gloss is her coat
she’s shining in the darkness like a beacon of hope
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7. |
My Skin Fell Off
05:39
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My skin fell off
my skin fell off
my skin fell off
my skin fell off
my skin fell off
so please, leave me alone
quit calling me on the phone
I don’t wanna talk
there’s not much new goin on
except my skin fell off
quit sending me messages
askin me where i’ve been
I’m lying in bed all day
missing my skin
I can’t come to your party
I’ll just make a scene
I can’t meet you for coffee
cuz I can’t wear anything
not gonna go to work
if I can’t keep my organs in
not gonna post a pic on social, man
I ain’t got no skin
thanks for reminding me
but I can’t go to your show
people just point at me
wherever I go
I can't go on a date
that’s out of the question
for reasons I think I’ve said
I don’t feel very sexy
I haven’t seen the new movies
or recently read a book
I’m pretty consumed with the way
I feel and I look
so quit throwing things at me
to see if they’ll stick
quit stealing my skin and driving around in my car
wearing it
please don’t let your dog approach me
he might get hungry for my meat
I’d rather not have to run
with these dumb skinless feet
I don’t wanna do an interview
I don’t wanna be on the news
I don’t want my skinless state to be clickbait
to sell ad revenue
Please don’t call me your skinless friend
I don’t want this to define me
It’s what’s inside that counts
which I guess you can see
Yeah my house is fallin apart and my lawn is overgrown and infested with snakes
and my sink is overflowing with dirty dishes and my bills are all late
and furthermore the world as we know it is falling apart due to carelessness and inaction
but what do you want me to do about it. I haven’t got any skin.
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8. |
Try Me Oblivion
03:17
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Just like that with ease I’ve conquered another day
and no doubt tomorrow will go the same way
until then I’ll rest myself on my big old bed
safe from mortal thoughts and existential dread
but oooh
oblivion tries to find me
‘one day i’ll catch up to you’
it tries to remind me
it’s a lot of real heavy stuff
but guess what i’m gonna win
oblivion you think you’re tough
but you’re nothing
try me oblivion
at the time my head alights on my pillowcase
my mind is clear and smug contentment blankets my face
close my eyes and rest in peace until the dawn
certain that the sun will rise and life will go on
but oooh
oblivion tries to find me
‘this might be all there is’
it tries to remind me
but I’ve got strong arms for punching
I’ve got powerful legs for running
I’ve got a heart that keeps on pumping
and oblivion you’re nothing
nothing
no-thing
try me oblivion
uh uh no way i’m gonna question my mortality
nice try little guy not gonna wonder when i’ll die
hell no don’t wanna know if there’s a hell and if i’ll go
move along oblivion I’ll live as long as I want
I’ll live as long as I want
I’ll live as long as I want
I’ll live as long as I want
so try me oblivion
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9. |
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you can tell by the way
that I look tonight
everywhere I go I’m leaving a mess
you can tell by the way
my body’s melting away
I’m unsound and plagued by odor & wetness
you can tell I’m not perfect
you can tell I’m not right
you can tell me to leave
and hell I just might
but tonight let’s let the pieces
of our junk fall where they will
we may not amount to much
but don’t we deserve a thrill
and I might be the only thing
that won’t be gone in the morning
cuz you know my kind doesn’t just
sweep itself away
so know this from me
not worth a shit as I may be
when I’m left somewhere
I’m there to stay…
If you can settle for trash
I will be your match
You will be whole at last
If you can just settle for trash
if you can settle for trash
I will be your match
we will be whole at last
if you can just settle for trash
Look I dunno if I’m
simply past my prime
or if I was never worth
nothing at all
But here with you tonight
watching time expire
I might as well be
non perishable
and yeah i’m spoiled, rotten
certain to be forgotten
deserving to be left
out in the cold
but if you’ll pardon me
before you consider discarding me
know though I’m gone
i’m still cluttering up your whole
world
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Howell Dawdy Louisville, Kentucky
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